31 Jan Balance

Welcome 2019! I’m excited that a new year is here. It is time for a fresh start, new beginnings and a clean slate.

I am sure you had time to come up with your new year resolutions. Maybe you even tested out one or two of them. I hope it is going well and continues to go well for you.

As I reflected on 2018 and prepared to enter the new year, the word BALANCE continued to appear. I spent some time questioning, praying and meditating on why the word BALANCE was being presented to me. While I questioned, I took to Google (we are BFFs, lol) to see what the world wide web had to say about BALANCE.

The definition that instantly popped up read: “to keep or put something in steady position so that it does not fall.” Of course there were other versions of this definition but this one really resonated with me.

Too many times we operate from a “go hard or go home” mentality. There is nothing steady in this state of being. You are essentially operating in go-mode. Honestly, functioning in one extreme rather than the other, or go-mode, has probably worked for you in the past. Most likely you’ve never given thought to how you function. You just function (you just go) in a certain way and chalk it up to “that’s the way I’m wired.” Many of you were never taught to think about what you think about or challenge your “wiring.”

In doing so, I would dare to say some areas of your life have suffered. You have missed educational opportunities; unachieved career goals; suffered failed relationship after failed relationship; lost friends; or, isolated yourself from family and friends. Perhaps the “go hard or go home” mentality has created a space of unrealistic goals and expectations. You feel overwhelmed. You feel like a failure, disappointed because you have been unable to deliver. Some where along the way of “just going” you lost your steadiness. You fell. You are off BALANCE.

I’m here to tell you being off BALANCE can be dangerous to your mental health and emotional wellness. It can create worry, isolation, rapid heart beats, memory issues, insomnia, overthinking and trouble breathing. In the mental health world that’s called anxiety Click Here. It can also make you feel numb; exhausted; negative and frustrated; and effect your problem solving skills. Therapist term these symptoms as burn-out Take the Burn-Out Self Test. Why am I sharing this with you?

Well, I’m so glad you asked! I’m sharing this because I’m all about hitting the target, obtaining career goals and aspirations. However, thinking about what you think about, maintaining a good BALANCE in your life will prevent you from falling. BALANCE keeps you grounded and focused on the goals and expectations that you have set for yourself.

Whether you have committed this new year to a better diet; ending toxic relationships; becoming financially sound; loosing weight; building positive esteem; going back to school; or, securing that promotion remember to take a step back every day. Honor EACH step that you have taken towards your goal.

Be leery when you find yourself offering more judgement in a situation than grace; more isolation from others than engagement; more restlessness than relaxation.

Get to know how you are wired and ask yourself, “What is happening here?” What am I thinking? Why am I thinking this? How do I feel in this moment? What is driving the emotion? Then, make the necessary adjustments. In other words, check your positioning and recalibrate, as needed.

Breathe, good deep breaths. Know that life is always about the journey and all of its lessons. It is never about the destination. That is how you prevent the fall. That is how you remain steady and maintain your BALANCE.

LOVE, all of the LIGHT. PEACE and continued PURPOSE to each of you.

Stay Courageous, Gentle Souls. Courageous

Pearl Bryant, LCSW-S